I recently moved in with my FMT. I'm renting his guest room. We're not LIVING TOGETHER.
It's a temporary thing. It works for now. It helps us both out.
We're still friends with benefits, my FMT and me. In fact, I think we've increased the friendship factor.
But the fact of the matter is, I'm living with a guy I have a history with, one that I have enjoyed fucking.
This didn't go over well with my sub.
I've never made a secret of being polyamorous. My sub knew it when he contacted me and knew that I've been seeing other guys since we've met.
So a week ago I was surprised when he admitted to feelings of raging jealousy and then verbally attacked me and my lifestyle choices.
The short version of our break up is this: he can't handle me being polyamorous.
Somewhere along the way, he'd fallen in love with me. It wasn't planned. It just happened. And he'd dealt with his insecurities and kept his jealousy under control until I moved in with my FMT. Then something in him snapped.
Somewhere along the way, I'd fallen for him too. How could I not? I enjoyed him in every way - kinky and vanilla. The play was phenomenal AND I loved spending time with him outside of the bedroom. He's smart and witty and I enjoyed his company as much as I craved his submission. He was a guy I could almost picture building a life with.
Until he snapped.
He's not poly. He doesn't get it. He can't handle it.
It's unfortunate. It's tragic, really. I've waited so long to find a sub I connect with. One who could satisfy my needs, D/s and otherwise.
If he was a cuck, he'd be perfect.
We're at a stalemate, my (former) sub and I. He can't handle even the thought of me with other guys. I'm polyamorous.
I'm a glass is half full kind of girl so I have to admit it's probably for the best that if this was going to be an issue, it's good that it came up now. As sadistic as I am, I don't relish hurting someone emotionally and clearly I was doing that to my sub.
I just had no idea that by moving in, it meant that I'd be moving on.
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Sorry to hear the news. It is difficult for us subs to avoid falling in love.
ReplyDeleteIt's unfortunate that he (your sub) doesn't "get it." On the other hand, you're correct it came to a head sooner rather than later. You'll find that special "cuckold" at some point!
ReplyDelete@Married Sub - Thanks. It might be as difficult for Dominants to avoid falling in love also.
ReplyDelete@Suzanne - A cuck would be fun but I'm not dead set on having one. It would have been super convenient if he had been one though. Thanks for commenting!